This has definitely been the most busy and demanding time of life up to this point. There are so many demands on my time and it is impossible to fulfill all of them with the kind of attention that I would like. It becomes even more depressing when I remember the many times my parents and professors have told me it only gets crazier from here.
Art is important and even essential in my life. I really do care about presenting myself well and constantly improving my work and myself as an artist. I treat those goals as guiding principles in my art. Lofty goals aside, reality hits. I have two jobs to help me get through school where I am also trying to enjoy social opportunities and dating because my parents and professors also often remind me I won’t ever get these chances again. Then I try to exercise and actually cook something a couple times a week so I can maintain some semblance of a healthy life.
How do people do it?
Nathan Fowkes, an amazing concept artist, just visited BYU and I was lucky enough to get a lot of interaction with him. The subject of balance came up and we asked if he does anything but art. Mostly in seriousness he said no, he didn’t. He said he has time for art and family and there is nothing else. I admire his drive and his work and believe that to be at his level in his industry that is true, but I don’t know if I can make that commitment. I want to be able to have more in my life and to have more experiences to incorporate into my art.
I’m trying my best to be a student, friend, daughter, sister, employee, and simply myself. It seems like a perfect balance is impossible, but perhaps in the constant struggle I am getting close enough.